Divorce Coaching & Mediation for Divorce & Child Custody

"Lou" Laurie Engelhardt, MS, Certified Professional Mediator , Boise ID 

Ever been heart-to-heart with a mustang? 
What does your heart feel when you are in conflict? Broken, shut down, closed?S
ee how things might be different. Check out blogs at: http://life.wevorce.com/articles/negativity-bias-impacts-divorce-thinking

Heart Based Process
What happened?
What are your opinions?
How do you feel?
What values are at stake?
What would meet your needs?

How do we find a solution that is both/and rather than either/or? 

Together or apart, all people are valuable and we all need each other to survive and succeed. 

Children Need Us To Work Together
Kids need "roots and wings", and each parent or adult in a child's life matters for a different reason.

Children need both parents, even if they are not perfect, in order to grow up without significant attachment disorders.  

"It takes a village to raise a child."Even though we get angry at each other, the way we work together going forward is the way to make peace, not only in our homes but in our world.

Identifying and creating needed change is never easy. That's why you sometimes need a good listener and some ideas for how to move forward.

Mediation Philosophy
Disagreement and conflict are familiar and normal parts of the human experience.

We have all felt heartbroken and shut down, angry and defensive, incomplete and disappointed.  

Culturally in the United States, marriage as we know it today was formalized by the "Church" in 1250 AD:
   -  women could not own property, could not work outside the home, had no voting rights or personhood other than to be a mother and wife
  - men were expected to take care of women entirely once they married them.  

Our world has changed, we live longer, we each contribute differently to relationships we create.

We do not need to be shamed when those relationships shift. We do need to take responsibility for the lives we have created, including our own and any children we have co-created. These are some of the most important decisions we will ever make.

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